These crackers are really horrible

[image image_id=”2004″ align=”left”]Right, so you’ve got a bit of Vacherin Mont d’Or and the bloody ‘priced like Harrod’s’ corner shop has no bread. So, the cunning idea arises to buy some crackers. And for the very best part of three quid I get a 150g box of The Fine Cheese Company’s Wholemeal Crackers. They are filthy pieces of horribleness.

I suppose some people might like the rough, sandy texture of these biscuits, but I could feel them abrading my teeth. This is something I rarely want to experience. As to the taste, it seems to be a taste which is very similar to the smell of cardboard tubes one finds in the centre of bog roll: dry, tough and associated with toilets.

What I want to know is why the hopeless shop Couture have to sell crap like this. Sure, it may say that it is organic, free-range, or other varieties of leftist shite, but that doesn’t necessarily make it taste nice. It’d be great if Couture could carry some things that you actually need to buy at reasonable prices rather than baroque, over-blown ephemera at stratospheric prices.

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I am a terribly charming loony who has finally found that severe PTSD, Generalised Anxiety Disorder and chronic psychosis is, on one of my all too rare good days, only a moderate impediment to having crazy fun with wine and food. Catch me outside and I am liable to be loudly attired.

  • Peter

    I sometimes worry about the things you compare flavours to.