Clonazepam deals very successfully with the anxiety of being bonkers, but it makes one tired and doesn’t really make one that happy. It also doesn’t do much for the happiness of those who have to look after we insane types. So Editor Dani and I sallied forth into Winchester and found ingredients to make a bevvie that’d perk up a particularly depressed sloth.
All you need is some heroically caffeinated energy drink, some heroically caffeinated effervescent vitamin pills (the Boots tropical fruit-flavoured Re-Energise Boost Effervescent pills we scored contain 180mg of guarana each) and some vodka!
Pour a bloody big slug of vodka into a highball glass, add two of the effervescent tablets and swirl until almost dissolved. Top up with energy drink. Allow the tablets to completely dissolve then drink with extraordinary pleasure.
In the ten minutes since I drank my glass I feel more awake, considerably jollier, less confused and TOTALLY ACE! OK, I’m still reasonably psychotic, but I’m quite happy about being reasonably psychotic. Hooray!
Dani was just commenting that if he opened a bar he could make a fortune skirting public-health meddlesome-ratbag petty fun-hating rules with this drink. It tastes really good too, a bit similar to a rather enlivening Hawksmoor Zombie cocktail – but approximately eighteen pounds cheaper.
Dani is going to mix me another now. Hooray again!